How to Rescue Your Motivation
Dear Friend,
When we are not winning, it's tempting to pretend
we don't care about our deepest aspirations. In a naive bid to avoid disappointment,
we disconnect from what we want. We say things like,
'He didn't call, but I don't care. He wasn't
the guy for me.'
John Molo, a top percussionist who has played
at the Grammys, flew out a guy to audition for
his band. Says Molo:
"This guy was really excited to audition. After he didn't get it, he immediately started with,
'Well, the money wasn't good anyway;
it's only a part-time thing.' I really felt like stopping the guy
and saying, 'You just didn't play well enough.'"
Sometimes we actually become hostile
to the object of our desire.
If we want a person's acceptance (yet aren't
getting it), we decide he is a jerk. If we want money (yet aren't earning enough)
we say that rich people are missing the meaning
of life. If we want a promotion (but fear being passed over),
we claim we're sick of the politics.
What Top Performers Do
On the surface, it makes sense to disown desires
that seem out of reach. 'There's no point in wanting something
I can't have,' we reason.
However, this does not work. No matter what obstacles we face,
we never truly relinquish our desires for
money, love, or career success.
Top performers stay connected to their desires,
even when they are not winning. At first, this is frightening;
admitting your desires makes you vulnerable.
Yet, this is the only way to rescue your motivation.
Mental Toughness Lesson
Select a career, money, or relationship
situation you are not winning in.
Ask yourself: What have you given up on?
If you do this exercise with honesty,
you can re-connect with your desire, and rescue your motivation. You still need to find a way to win with this life challenge--but at least you know what you want. Motivation is within your grasp.
I'll talk to you again soon.
Your friend,
Lisa B.
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